Of course I obsess about the status of my child’s social relationships, so here is another post about it.
This just might be my understanding of it but it sounds good to me. So the conversation took place like this:
Me: Did you play with M today?
Kid: No. She was not in school today.
Me: Who did you play with?
Kid: E, but she didn’t want to play with me anymore.
Me: (feeling disappointed again) Did that make you feel sad or upset?
Kid: (looks up and smiles) It made me happy!
Me: (chuckling) Why?
Kid: Cos I got to play with K. He is so much fun.
Ok, so this not-wanting-to-be-his-friend is simply kids walking over to another group to probably play with a more interesting toy. That’s normal. I can live with that.
Towards the end of that convo, my husband walks in and I looked at him to show how relieved I am. It was my way to say – I finally got it! I was paranoid for a few days about this whole social relationships thing. I have these thoughts that my child would be a pariah, someone who didn’t seem cool enough to be friends with.
Do I have visions of my son being famous at school and at the same time a really nice, considerate and kind person–not to mention smart? Yes! As a woman myself, I don’t want him to be a jerk at all, but of course life will take its course and sometimes he would be a jerk. Just like the rest of us.
I’m aware enough not to be too worried and encroach on his personal space. Some things are learned without a parent around. All I can keep doing is to continuously evolve as a parent that he needs.